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Inspiration Is Found Through Loving Who You Are

Lessons Learned by Allowing Myself to Feel the Pain

I am not saying that it is ok to wallow in it, that is actually one of the worst things you can do.

I get the feeling, the hurt, the pain.  However, I will keep getting on that horse and do it all over again.


This last one left a little bit of a mark, one where at moments, I still fall into the hole of upset, anger and despair.  In those moments, I let myself feel it, every excruciating feeling that his leaving did to me, and then I remember that I do not deserve to be treated that way.

He was the one who didn’t realize I was opening up to him, becoming more, becoming the type of person he wanted me to be for him.  I was not changing who I was, but adding to who I was.

Due to his impatience, and immovable spirit to try and become what I wanted him to be, while maintaining himself, he lost everything he could have had.

You see, I had opened up to him, in the deepest of ways, telling him everything he needed to hurt me, because he had given me the confidence to trust him.  I trusted in the fact that he was never going to be the person that was going to run.  I trusted in the fact that he would fight for what we were trying to have, because that is what he said he was going to do.

In the very end, his actions spoke much louder than his words.

I said I needed support, and patience while suffering through physical pain, and once that pain was over, he would be well-rewarded.  He has NO patience.

He said to me he didn’t want anyone else, I told him it was ok to falter, just don’t throw it in my face.  He didn’t just throw it, but chucked it at me with voracious speed.

I said to him, I needed someone strong, someone who would fight for us,  He said he would go to the ends of the earth to fight for what we were building and that he would never run,  He not only ran, but kicked it in overdrive.

Instead of being an adult, telling me that it was over for him, and that he never wanted to see me again, was something I could handle and understand.  I can be strong and handle not letting him in again.

No, instead he tells me that it was his way to leave a wound, deep and bleeding, so that there was no chance of HIM crawling back and me accepting it.


Joke is on him.  He helped me to remember what it felt like to be in love, and nurture that love.  He reminded me of what it was like to have someone to come home to, kiss them, and have them also nurture you.

While my wound is still open and sore, it is still healing, but this time, there will be no scar, only lessons learned.  Happy positive lessons that someone else will be able to benefit from.

While he may find someone who is willing to stroke his ego, he will never be happy with knowing what he left, and how good it was going to be for him had he just been patient.


I make a conscious choice everyday to open up more and more.  I have met new friends, socially, personally, and intimately.  I allow them the space to lean towards me, and they back up just enough to allow me to lean back.  They don’t take up all the space that I must have in order to give them what they want.


And I will feel pride and happiness within myself knowing that I never used any of his dark secrets to get revenge, or to even remotely try to hurt him back.



“…Let Go of Knowing Who You Are…” T.B.

A couple of weeks ago, I suffered a break up.  Even strong, positive people will feel hurt and pain.  Strong people are strong because they understand that no matter what happens in life, they can survive through some of the harshest emotional conditions.

This does not by any means, mean that they do not feel at all, and that they do not struggle with heartbreak.

During those times, we do seek out help because our emotions can be too much to handle.

I reached out and asked the universe to help me through the pain that I was going through because the man that I had fallen in love with, had given up on me, and just walked out.

I had fallen for this man deeply enough to be able to tell him my dark secrets, as well as the things that happened in my past that hurt me even to this day…

  1. Being lied to
  2. Not cheating on me, but doing it and then throwing it in my face
  3. Not being strong enough to handle me at my worst, because dammit if I wasn’t there when they were at theirs
    1. (i.e. being hurt in the middle of the night because they suffer from a condition called “REM Sleep Disorder Behavior” (RBD) which could have killed me, and several other times caused bruising)
    2. (Getting so drunk that you cannot control certain functions (I won’t elaborate but it’s a thing)
    3. (Getting so drunk that you have to be almost carried out to a vehicle to leave the bar)
    4. and many more.

I loved this man enough to try and encourage him to continue being the man that he was.  I encouraged him to spend time with his family.  I encouraged him to go to his luau’s, I encouraged him to go surfing because he missed it soooo much.

Every time he told me that he would rather be right next to me, and still turned around and blamed me for not loving him enough, because his way of loving is smothering.  His belief of being in love meant that I should have fallen to my knees thanking the heavens everyday that he was in my life and worshiping the ground he walked on.

While I believed that love is a partnership where each person gets to be the individual that they are, loving the individual things they love to do, while at times being able to share said things, and coming together at the end of the day to discuss what it was about that day that was so amazing.

I momentarily forgot all of this until I spoke with Taylor Brearley.  When I reached out to the universe and asked for guidance and help in feeling better, I was guided to this man.  I might tell you the story sometime, but for now that is not what mattered.

What mattered is this man gave me his time, more than normally allotted.  He had to remind me that I was going to survive this, and then he quoted me the following “The moment you let go of knowing who you are is the same moment that you discover yourself.”

I understood the premise behind his statement, so I took the next couple of weeks to really let it sink in.

I have always known myself to be a determined, strong willed individual, who doesn’t allow others to cross my boundaries, nor will I let them control my situations and outcomes.  I am the one who has always kept a pretty tight grip on what I believe is right for my life.

So I sat back each night, maybe even drank a little, focused on this statement, and allowed myself to see myself as someone other than who I thought myself to be.  This was my process to realize that I don’t have to be anything I originally thought myself to be.

I don’t have to be so strict about my boundaries, just honor them.

I do not have to guard my feelings, emotions, and fears, because who I am to others is what allows them to love me for me, who ever I happen to be in that moment.  My friends love me, because I can be kind, generous, light-hearted and even fun, even when I am not in control.


I feel refreshed, happy, and completely ready to continue facing my life.  There will be days that I am sure that I will still feel some negativity and pain from this experience, but each time that I do, I will learn something new about myself because I am not the same person on a day to day basis.

I feel this new sense of being and life because Taylor Brearley helped me to see new sides of everything.  I opened myself up to him and allowed him to teach me.

While I never told this man about my family, or those who have passed, he was able to connect to them in order to help me through the anguish.

Even if you are a skeptic, or do not believe what so ever in divine power, he is still worth the time and money to speak to.  Tell him what you feel, and what you need help with, and he will.

If you want to learn more about Psychic Taylor, and what qualifies him to help you, please feel free to visit his website at:



He is profound, and will help you by using his own specific gifts and knowledge.


Just so you are aware, I do not get any compensation for writing this.  It was due to my own experience with Taylor that I was honored to write this article.

Learning to Truly Listen to My Intuition

My dreams are always coming true, only this time, I didn’t get the meaning of the message until 2 days after the situation happened. A little over a week ago I began dreaming for 3 nights in a row, of my common law ex.  Nothing really important, just of him in general.  The major component of the end of this relationship was that after 7 years together, I left him because of him lying about his cheating on me. I left 2 or 3 days shy of our anniversary.  (This was in February 2010)

The New Relationship

I met and began dating this guy on February 9th of this year.  Then about 6 weeks later decided to become his girlfriend.  I never once lied to him or even held back ANY truths. (more…)

The Biological Father

I may not be a perfect person, in fact I am far from it, but I can say for sure that I did my best as a mother.

My children, were both spoiled and disciplined, and both have grown up to be amazing people.

I can also say with love and certainty that I have a wonderful fantastic relationship with both of my children.  They also, in turn, happen to love and respect one another, and it fills my heart with so much love and pride to see them react with one another.


I didn’t meet this man until I was 18 years old, and even then at the age of 42 do not know anything about this man because he himself has not attempted to contribute to my life, the life of my children, nor the lives of my brother and sister who are also products of his sperm.

The only meaningful thing this man has done for any of us is brought the three of us together.  End of story.

Yet this man gets pissed at us because we do not cater to him and HIS emotions.  We do not honor and cherish this man as most children would with a father.


Instant Switch Video Review

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Lonliness is a Choice


Whether you like to believe it or not, loneliness really is a choice.

Even if you do not understand what I am trying to say in the video, the point of the story is…

You need to inspire yourself to get out of the house or apartment.  Take a walk, smile at passerby’s, or search for events near you that you would be excited to try out, then just GO!  Don’t worry if you are going alone.  Even if you are just going to the park, let yourself say hello and smile.  Take a risk and give out flowers, or just do one thing out of the ordinary, eventually, you will notice that you have admirers.  Soon after, friends that are willing to be around you when you want them or need them.

Have a blessed day and remember, your life is what you make of it.

Love Heather


Complications of Being Me

Moments in a Fog

Since I have begun the self help journey, life has become a lot better for me.  But there are moments where it hits me that I am still not completely fixed.

I still have a long road ahead, and I know that I will clear out the issues.  However there are still issues that are holding me back.  Growing up I was raised by a very abusive man, and a mother who was much more doting on her son than on me.  I was a rag doll who didn’t know how to make my own friends, keep them and maintain them.

basically, I am sitting in my home right now, about ready to leave to go enjoy 4th of July fireworks with only just my son and I.  No friends invited me to go, and of course I have not called any of my friends to go with me, or if we could tag along with them.

This man who beat me up, always told me that I should never involve myself with other people’s business and stuff… and so here I am, friendless on one of my favorite holidays.

Laziness vs. Awkwardness

I want to go out and do things, but the only ones that really inspire me to be able to leave my house are my children or any one of my brothers.  Some days I feel as if I am better off alone, until the total feeling of loneliness sets in.

I am not the typical girly girl mom.  I love football, racing, hiking, camping, and rowdy loud bbq’s.  I also love going out painting at those paint and wine places, watch romantic comedies, and love all things puppy.  I can bbq and really good at it, I can fix things, and change the oil in my own car.

I am uninspired though.  I am uninspired to go new things because I have no one to do things with.  I don’t have a female bestie like me that wants to do things with me.  I don’t have a male bestie to do things with or inspire me to do anything other than nothing.

This is what I need fixed, and I don’t know how to fix it.

Please don’t take this wrong

I understand that I have this issue, and this sad hurtful feeling I have right now will go away and I will move on to be my normal happy self.  The point of all this is so people understand, that even when you are working on creating a better life, there will be moments where you need to recognize your feelings.

Write down what you are feeling in the moment, take that feeling, and find out how to clear it.  This block of mine will go away, and I will make some great friends who will inspire me to do what it is that I want to do.

Instant Switch – Creating a More Positive life!

Flip SwitchI dare you to flip this switch and watch the video.  Chances are, you are too afraid of change, even if it is a more positive change.

Most people do not believe that they are worthy of a happy, positive, successful life.  Is this you?  Do you believe that you can’t leave that town, that you will never make it anywhere else?

Then I want you to answer the following questions as honestly as you possibly can…

What is holding you back?!  Who is holding you back?!  What is it that has your mind chained to the position that you are in right now?!

I want you to email me your answers to h.kemp@heatherspage.ws right now with the Subject Line: “Impossible Dreams”.


I don’t want to be the one to tell you that you are wrong, or that you can change your situation, and that all it takes is just the smallest bit of hope.

So at this point, I challenge you again to both, send me an email answering those questions, and then filling out the information below to watch the video.

I guarantee you, with the right tools, and guidance, you too can have the happy, positive life that you deserve.  No matter what has happened to you in the past.


B.Y.O.B. – Be Your Own Boss